Thursday, March 12, 2009

25 Random Lies About Me, issue eighteen

18. I love Macintosh computers and refuse to use anything else.

macicon - Share on Ovi

Once, I had a chance to meet Steve Jobs backstage at the Macworld conference.

macworld - Share on Ovi

Maybe he was just having a bad day, and maybe I handled the situation poorly by giving him a bear hug before speaking to him, but as soon as he was free he started screaming about how I should leave him the f*** alone and go take all the other sycophantic freaks and go get a f***ing "ilife" 'cause at the end of the day it's still just a f***ing computer. Justin Long was standing nearby, and he really looked like this hurt his feelings.

justin long - Share on Ovi

I didn't have the time to worry about Justin, though. In a Mac-fan induced rage, I grabbed Steve Jobs by the collar and I slapped him hard across the mouth, screamed, "Blasphemer! You will burn in the digital fires of a poorly-designed virtual hell for an eternal load-time!"

windows-logo-loading - Share on Ovi

Then I ran away from security.

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